Updated: Apr 3
What is it about commitments to others that prevents us from cancelling at the last minute, not showing up or failing to follow through.
We don't want to let them down? We don't want to hurt their feelings? We don't want to leave them disappointed?
When it comes to making promises to others, we want to honour what we said we would do and be considered a reliable person they can count on.
So why is it that when we make commitments to ourselves we easily find excuses not to follow through.
A prime example of this for me has been my health and fitness goals. My training over the last few years has been pretty hit and miss. I've replaced exercise with going to the office earlier, cleaning the house, reading a book or just staring in to space for a few hours telling my self "oh, I'll just go later". Well guess what happens, I almost never make it.
Inevitably "I'll just go later" turns to "oh, I'll just go tomorrow" and "next week, I'll be better".
It's only been in the last week that I've realised every time I do this, I am letting myself down. and telling myself that I'm not as important as the other people and commitments in my life. Every time I do this, the easier it gets to not follow through. You become the flakey friend that never turns up, always cancels and you become to expect it of yourself.
One way to challenge this is to recognise your barriers and take action.
The next time you find yourself beginning to flake on a commitment, promise or something nice you were going to do for you; consider whether you would be thinking the same if you were doing It for someone else and then say "I do not break promises to myself". Chances are you are more likely to talk yourself around and follow it through.
So the message to take away for May. "Honour the commitments to yourself in the way you would for others".